Hi…. it’s me, again. I feel like I’m writing the same post over and over, but here it goes.
The truth is I’m drowning. I have no idea how moms work 40+ hours a week, train for marathons they PR at, cook delicious meals every night, take amazing photos, write beautiful posts, keep their homes spotless, spend quality time with their significant other, and sleep 8+ hrs a night. I admire these moms and want to grovel at their feet. If you’re looking for that here, you’re not going to find it.
The truth is I cry at least one night per week on the way home from work because I fear I won’t make it to daycare before they close. I cry because even after I get her I’ll only have one hour until it’s time to put her to bed. I cry because the books tell me the reason why my 6 month old isn’t sleeping at night is because we put her to bed so late. I cry because putting her to bed any earlier would mean not seeing her at all. I cry because mom guilt is real and it’s scary.
The truth is we have the same 5 meals every week because they’re easy and they’re quick. They’re not super healthy or spectacular, but it’s real food and it works for us. I miss my creative, out-of-the-norm meals, but now a days I have a severe mental block when it comes to planning our meals for the week.
The truth is I fall asleep on the couch every night before 9pm. After putting Annalynn to bed, eating dinner, and washing those damn bottles I’m so exhausted I can barely keep my eyes open.
The truth is my dog is overdue for her shots, I still need to find a new doctor to review my less-than-stellar thyroid tests, and I finally got a much-needed haircut on Monday only to hate it and not have the time to reschedule a re-do.
The truth is I prefer to celebrate the small victories, like making enough food for my daughter because that is one thing I can make happen.
The truth is I don’t have it all together and that’s okay. I may not have Pinterest-perfect meals or always know the right thing to blog about, but I have a beautiful family, a place to call home, and plenty of food to eat.
The truth is this is my life. Maybe one day I’ll figure it all out, but for now I’m taking it one step at at time.