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Home Alone

by Meghann on June 10, 2013

Derek comes home today! Derek comes home today! Derek comes home today!

I dropped him off at the airport on Thursday and have had the house to myself all weekend. Usually I’m the one traveling and he’s the one home alone on the weekend, so it was quite the role reversal for us.

When Derek first started planning the trip, I was secretly excited to have the house to myself for the whole weekend. Before I moved in with Derek, I lived by myself in Orlando for over two years and loved every second of it. It’s my opinion that everyone should live by themselves for at least a year. I had a lot of time to discover who I was when I lived on my own and loved being an independent woman. I love my husband more than anything, but sometimes I do miss having my own space.

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When I lived on my own, I used to have co-workers/friends/ family members complain to me when their significant other went out of town. They were lonely, bored, and felt nervous sleeping all alone in their house. At the time I never understood what they were complaining about. I loved being on my own, I rarely got bored or lonely and slept like a baby all alone in my big bed. I told them to take advantage of being on their own for a weekend and live it up. They would still pout and make a comment about not cooking, since there wasn’t a point to cooking for one. That always made me laugh. If I thought like that, I would never eat real food.

Oh, if I could go back and tell my past self what a fool she was. The truth was I’d never lived with a boy and had yet to experience that dependent nature that forms when you live with someone. Heck, I didn’t realize just how dependent I’d grown on my husband until I was home all alone, trying to sleeping in my big bed, and I was suddenly concentrating on every weird noise coming from outside, wishing Derek was there to protect me. Damn.

The first night was fine. I caught up on all my “Meghann Shows” (aka stuff Derek prefers not to watch) on the DVR and went to bed as normal. The loneliness kicked in Friday night when I was on my couch by myself on a Friday night with no one to cuddle with, on Saturday when there was no one to make pancakes with, and Sunday when I had zilch to do and was completely on my own.

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And cooking for one? Totally didn’t happen. On Thursday night I made a sandwich for dinner and on Friday night I ordered pizza. The pizza leftovers were great for lunch on Saturday and Sunday, and Saturday night I had another sandwich for dinner. The funny part is I always make fun of Derek for eating nothing but sandwiches and take out when I’m away, and look at me doing the exact same thing.

I told Derek yesterday that he has to be the world’s best husband for putting up with all the traveling that I do. When you’re the one traveling, you’re constantly on the move so the loneliness doesn’t have a chance to sink in. I miss Derek like crazy when I’m away, but the time flies so fast that I know I’ll get to see him again in a blink of an eye. When you’re the one at home, the time doesn’t move as fast. I sat on my couch by myself for four hours yesterday morning watching the last half of the final season of Desperate Housewives on Netflix (something I’d been meaning to do for a while) and when it was done, it was only one and I had nothing to do.

My sincere apologies to everyone I’ve ever secretly questioned when they said they hated being on their own when their significant other was out of town. I 100% get it now. I may have loved living on my own in my early twenties, but I love living with my husband even more. I still miss living on my own in a nostalgic way, but I wouldn’t trade where I’m at now for anything in the world.

On a side note, I was inspired on Sunday to bake something and was semi-successful with this Chocolate Chip Brioche Pretzel recipe.

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Not as pretty as the original Pinterest photo, but still tasted pretty good. I did add a glaze to mine – I thought it was missing a little somthin’ somethin’.

I also did some meal prep for the week, packed my lunch and breakfast for today, prepped my swim bag for the morning, and watched the Tonys. At least I was productive with my time. ๐Ÿ™‚

{ 36 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Krissy @ Shiawase Life June 10, 2013 at 11:56 am

Mmm I love pretzels.
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2 Jessica June 10, 2013 at 12:06 pm

It’s funny, I know exactly what you mean even though I’ve pretty much lived with everyone I’ve dated at some point. In between I was always like ‘I LOVE HAVING SO MUCH ALONE TIME!’ but yesterday I worked on starting up my etsy shop (finally) and was upstairs the entire day while Ryan was downstairs watching TV/playing xbox (just relaxing because I’m making him clean tonight haha) and I was just thinking aw, how badly do I want to get this done..? I missed him and he was just downstairs. Pathetic? Maybe. haha.
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3 Katie @ Peace Love & Oats June 10, 2013 at 12:17 pm

Haha I’m totally in your old state of mind where I’m like, you’ll be just fine! I’ve lived alone in a studio for just about three years now!
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4 lisa fine June 10, 2013 at 12:19 pm

Glad to hear he’s back, and as always, I love your honesty.

I’m totally with you – when I’m with my fiance, I love to cook us meals, but when I’m on my own, it’s simple all the way. Like leftovers, cereal, or snacking.
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5 Ashley June 10, 2013 at 12:30 pm

Agree on EVERYTHING you just said! I loved living alone, I think everyone should do it. I cherish the occasional single nights I have to myself for girly shows, etc. But once it’s more than 24 hours I’m over it, I’m lonely and bored and scared of everything! Crazy how that happened without my even realizing it…
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6 Katie @ running4cupcakes June 10, 2013 at 12:36 pm

I agree – I love to have the house to myself at times to get stuff done, watch TV that only I want to watch and just do whatever I want to do, but I miss him like crazy when he is gone and I totally don’t sleep as well either!!
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7 Natalie @ Free Range Human June 10, 2013 at 12:38 pm

I love those rare opportunities when I get the house to myself. I love my husband and want him around 98% of the time, but that 2% of “me” time is so much fun!

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8 Annie @ my fuel and fitness diaries June 10, 2013 at 12:38 pm

Well I cant really speak to the other side of the coin, but I have lived by myself for the last 4 years and LOVE it. I used to get kinda lonely, but now I have my dog and Im usually pretty OK just hanging out with her. But I think if I was used to someone being around all of the time it would be so hard when they left!
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9 Sara @ LovingOnTheRun June 10, 2013 at 12:46 pm

I completely understand! I thankfully don’t have my husband leave town very often, but when he isn’t here for one reason or another it is so lonely and just not the same! We spend a lot of time together, and I wouldn’t have it any other way! So when there is no one around its get too quiet and too lonely!
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10 Vivian June 10, 2013 at 12:48 pm

when we were dating, i hated it because i was so lonely, when we got married, i loved it because i could do whatever i wanted and the house stayed clean and organized. now that we have kids, i’m back to hating it again because i totally need his help with the kids! one parent and two kids is tough. mad props to single parents!

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11 Megan (The Lyons' Share) June 10, 2013 at 12:54 pm

This makes me laugh! Like you, when I lived alone I loved it and always told others to enjoy it when their spouses went out of town. Although I do love being with people and consider myself fairly social, I’m an introvert at heart so I value my alone time. But after living with my husband for 4 years, I do miss him when I’m home alone!! We have found such a comfortable way of living together (while still giving each other space) that I now know it’s way better than being alone (for me at least, especially since we both travel for work 4 days/ week). Glad Derek’s coming back!
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12 [email protected] June 10, 2013 at 1:07 pm

I lived with the flamates for 1,5 year and I had a blast. Then I wanted to live on my own and I sucked in it. It was just a thiny studio, but I had to check every closet and even behind the shower curtain when I enter the apartment. ๐Ÿ™‚ I was eating in student restaurant and my fridge was mostly empty or filled with snacks. Not to mention that my grocery bill was as big as now when it’s two of us.
I love living with my boyfriend! When he is gone I end up sleeping at his side of bed and sniffing the pillow. I know, pathetic ๐Ÿ™‚
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13 Sarah @makingitmyhome.blogspot.com June 10, 2013 at 6:42 pm

I sleep in my boyfriends clothes when he is gone for the night….but I take up the whole bed instead and really sprawl out!
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14 Laura June 10, 2013 at 1:50 pm

My husband has only been away for three nights max since we’ve been married but I actually don’t mind it until I go to bed and then I freak myself out! I’m a homebody so I enjoy watching tv shows he hates and reading when he’s out of town. And I have my dog so I figure she’ll bark/growl if anyone comes by at night!

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15 Kristy @ Kristy's Health Revolution June 10, 2013 at 2:18 pm

I could have written this blog post. I was the girl who would roll her eyes at people who pouted when their significant other was out of town, because I like being alone! But now, I get excited when I learn I’ll be on my own, and I enjoy it for approximately 2 hours. Then I’m just bored and wish I had someone to talk to. Haha!
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16 Jan @ Sprouts n Squats June 10, 2013 at 2:21 pm

I lived on my own for a year too and loved it. I never sleep well if my boyfriend is away for work I am a big baby. I do love my time to myself now more than ever but I definitely prefer having my boyfriend home even if we are both doing our own thing. ๐Ÿ™‚
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17 Becky @ Olives n Wine June 10, 2013 at 2:24 pm

I know exactly how you feel! I love “living by myself” when my husband is gone since I am so independent but it is crazy to realize how dependent I’ve become since being married!
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18 Katie June 10, 2013 at 2:32 pm

I’m jealous! I lived on my own for a year and a half and loved it! Now I’m working for my parents and living with them, the town I live in is small and they’re aren’t rental options. I’m considering buying my own place but afraid of making such a big jump all by myself! Someday I’ll have a hubby to hang with and miss, (hopefully) and will understand a little more about where you are coming from!
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19 Lindsay June 10, 2013 at 3:05 pm

I LOVE living on my own. But that’ probably because I’ve never lived with a guy before. Sigh. One day.
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20 Kelly @ Kelly the Culinarian June 10, 2013 at 3:24 pm

I also have “Kelly Shows” that I watch when my husband is in class at night or studying on the weekends. Life is all about balance, and our time apart makes me enjoy our time together more.

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21 Nicole June 10, 2013 at 6:09 pm

“Absence makes the heart grow fonder” ๐Ÿ™‚ I’m sure he’s glad to be home as well!

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22 Sarah @makingitmyhome.blogspot.com June 10, 2013 at 6:30 pm

Couldn’t have said these words better myself! I loved living alone, and firmly agree its a right of passage in your 20’s to do that (along with living with roommates)
But now that Ryan and I have lived together for a few years, I question every weird noise-especially at night. It makes it so hard to fall and stay asleep.
Welcome back Derek!

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23 Heather @ HeatherRunsFast.com June 10, 2013 at 7:07 pm

Those pretzels look ridiculous! I was the same way when my husband started traveling. We had just moved into our house and I wasn’t used to all the noises. I got so freaked out one time I actually called the cops, haha. Now that I am used to being home alone for long periods of time, I’m fine. And yes, sometimes I even enjoy it ๐Ÿ˜‰
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24 Emily @ Life on Food June 10, 2013 at 7:23 pm

My husband and I both travel for work and normally our schedules for being away do not coordinate. The person at home always had the bad end of the deal.
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25 Emily:2:design:cents June 10, 2013 at 8:09 pm

So cute! I completely relate to this-I think there’s a “learning curve” when you first start living with someone. When I first started living with my boyfriend I was yearning for space/alone time, but now when he leaves, I can’t wait until he gets back! I think you just get used to it:)
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26 BroccoliHut June 10, 2013 at 8:16 pm

I know exactly what you mean! I lived by myself for two years prior to getting married, and I loved it! Everything was on my time, I could cook and watch whatever I wanted.
Now though, it’s totally different. Seth is traveling next week, and I’m already thinking “what am I going to DO for three days?!”
My, how quickly things change!
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27 Cait @ Dare to Move. June 10, 2013 at 8:38 pm

I agree with you – I think that everyone should live alone for at least a year! I lived on my own for two years during my junior and senior years of college, and I loved every minute of it! There is something to be said for learning about yourself and spending time doing things that you love to do without any interruptions! At the same time, I can definitely see how it would be hard to go back after living with someone again!

I am glad that you ended up making the most of your time this weekend ๐Ÿ™‚ I hope you enjoyed it!
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28 Meghan June 10, 2013 at 11:31 pm

I completely agree with you Meghann!
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29 Lisa June 11, 2013 at 5:18 am

I totally agree!! I love to have the house to myself at times to get stuff done, but I miss him like crazy when he is away for more than a few days.
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30 Lynne June 11, 2013 at 7:36 am

I can no longer seem to access your blog in mobile view (on my Nook) ever since the new makeover. Is this no longer an option?

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31 Meghann June 11, 2013 at 7:54 am

That’s strange, I can still see mobile view in my phone. I haven’t changed any of the mobile settings, so I don’t know how to fix the problem. ๐Ÿ™ Let me do some googling and see what’s up.

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32 Ashley @ Eat Run Live Happy June 11, 2013 at 7:42 am

I’ve never lived on my own but my ex husband was deployed for a year and I was alone. I had a 12 month old baby though. Still, it was nice. I really grew stronger in that year.
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33 Carrie This Fit Chick June 11, 2013 at 8:23 am

I know how you feel! Well, sort of.. In a small sense! I thought I was good at being alone until I left my boyfriend for the summer. We had been living together, so now it just feels weird. So lonely!
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34 Sarah @ Yogi in Action June 11, 2013 at 9:44 am

I completely agree with this!

I lived on my own for 3 years and loved it! Now, I’ve been living with my boyfriend for over a year- and feel the exact same way. How life changes, right?!
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35 Emily N June 11, 2013 at 12:16 pm

I am honestly the opposite. When J and I were dating and just living together (premarriage) I used to fret and whoa is me all the time when he is traveling. But now that we are married, I miss him, but I look forward to it. I get to watch the tv shows he doesn’t want. I can eat popcorn or cereal and call it dinner (he says that’s not a meal). The dogs and I get the bed to ourselves and can use ALL the pillows.
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36 Sonia the Mexigarian June 12, 2013 at 3:50 pm

My husband travels a bit for work and I do enjoy my alone time, catching up on me movies, etc. I can do whatever the heck I want and not feel guilty for not spending time with the hubs. Though, at night I get a little scared and barricade myself in the bedroom at bedtime. lol. I’m used to the house making noises, as are my pets, but when I hear something strange that perks the interest of my cats and dog, then I start freaking out. Especially if said dog stares at a corner and starts huffing/growling. [again, i should stop watching Ghost Adventures and anything related to the supernatural before bed]
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