Spaghetti squash leftovers take two: this time I went the mexican route.
I reheated the squash on the stovetop with some spinach and black beans and seasoned with a mix of chili powder, oregano, cumin, salt, and pepper. When everything was nice and hot, I added some feta (the only cheese we had) and finished it with salsa.
Pretty tasty. I knew black beans and spaghetti squash would make for an awesome combination and the whole meal took 5 minutes to make – all I had to do was heat everything up and mix it together.
And while I ate, I tuned into Daytime to watch the Pretty Muddy segment we had recorded on Tuesday. (you can watch the whole thing HERE).
But the whole time I was watching myself on screen, I couldn’t stop thinking “Man, I look fat.”
I tend to carry a lot of my weight in my middle section and the fitted t-shirt wasn’t doing me any favors there. It wasn’t the shirt’s fault (it had a cute design, great color, and was really soft and comfortable), it’s just the way my belly is. That’s one of the reasons I tend to shy away from wearing t-shirts. I have a closet full of them because they always look so cute and comfortable on other people, but they just do not work on my body type. I need something with a little more structure that conceals the mid-section and instead draws attention up to my shoulders and arms (I have some killer collar bones ).
But that’s not the point. Having that “I look fat” thought instantly made me feel bad about myself. I’m not sure which I hated more at that point, how I looked on camera or the fact I was beating myself up over it. My goal is to promote healthy body images, confidence, and loving yourself no matter what size or shape as long you’re healthy and happy. But I’m also human (and a girl) and sometimes the negative thoughts do creep up.
I could make a million excuses as to why my middle section looked that way on screen (bad angle, ill fitting shirt, horrible posture, etc.), but what it all comes down to is I have a bit of a belly. A belly that I’m not ashamed of, but a little hard to take when I see myself on national TV. And if I do have a problem with the way my belly is, then I should do something about it.
Luckily that’s what I’ve already started doing. I oddly found comfort in the fact that I have a bridal shape-up plan in the works and I can add “work on stomach” as one of those goals. Again, nothing extreme – I’m just looking to mix up my workout routine while eating a little less of the “bad” stuff and a little more of the “good” stuff.
So what did I do next? Well first I immediately took to gchat and found comfort in talking everything over with a friend (where would we be without awesome friends?!) then I went to my bathroom mirror and took a few deep breaths before leaving myself a little reminder a la Operation Beautiful.
Because sometimes we all need a reminder of how awesome we are, especially on days when we’re not feeling too hot.
To all my friends, if you ever have one of those negative moments, just repeat after me, “I am STRONG. I am HEALTHY. I am BEAUTIFUL.” And smile.